I'm with the Banned

Band Scout by Lady HM on Polyvore.com

While catching up on some DVR'd TV, I decided to hop on to my neglected Polyvore account. I forgot how much fun it is! It's like paperdolls/dress-up/virtually shopping all in one. 

I'm gonna be going out tomorrow night to see my buddy friends play a show. Their band is called Rawrr! They're gonna be playing in an old dance studio/semi-historic building on main street. So excited! 

I decided to create a little going out outfit for the night out. (Of course all the clothes I will actually be wearing are a fraction of the price of these lovely duds).


Hope you all have a stupendously wonderful weekend up ahead! I'll be posting some pics later this weekend of the show, Saturday Links, Teeny Tiny Things Sunday and The 5th Annual Oscar Party. (Wow! A busy weekend!) 


~HM~

Ticket to Ride

I have quite the silly obsession with London. I'm sure it partly comes from my sisters. Melanie was totally obsessed with the Spice Girls and all things London when she was in high school. I remember her staying up late watching this ridiculous British comedy on PBS (the name escapes me). She eventually got to go on a trip after her senior year of high school. And I remember my other sister Angelica watching the Monty Python show. I remember not quite getting what was funny about it. (Thankfully, due to such early influences, I have quite the eclectic tastes and enjoyment of British humor). And of course these tastes can all be traced back to our lovely mother. She likes to remind me that she liked the British boys long before I.

(Side note: I think I did her proud that one summer I brought home the British Soccer/Football player, hot damn, he was lovely!...a nostalgic post for another day...le sigh... :)

Anywho, yes, I'd absolutely love, love, love, to visit London. My good friend Jamie and I keep planning on going. Sadly, work and school have gotten in the way. Oh yeah, and that thing called money. Blast! But one day, hopefully soon, we'll make it there. We have this idea that the minute we set foot in the UK all of our dreams will come true or something. Silly, I know. But really, we'd just love to go and experience all it has to offer.

We came up with a list a while back of all the things we wanted to do. Here's what I can remember:

1) Audition for the West End Sam Mendes/Kevin Spacey Theatre Company

2) Bump into Daniel Radcliff

3) Watch a football game

4) Go on a Banksy Street Art Hunt

5) Take pictures on Abbey Road

6) Go to a pub and eat some fish n' chips

7) Eat some beans on toast

8) Have a themed pub party called "We Love the Word Rubbish-An American Tour of London Summer 20-- Trip of Rock Awesomeness.

So, if you've been to London and I'm leaving something major off the list, please let me know.

~HM~

Oh Pandora how you know me so! 

Well I'm so sad tonight

And the words won't come out right

It's been a long day on the track

And its stamina that I lack

 

So won't you run to me tonight?

Tonight we could pretend that we're just lovers

But I'll only ever be a middle distance runner

 

Well my heart is beating hard

And I'm off with a shot at the start

And my legs tremble from strain

But by the finish line I am drained

 

So won't you run to me tonight?

Tonight let's not talk about next summer

Cause I'll only ever be a middle distance runner

 

Well I'm so proud tonight

Of the woman you've become

And I'm just too tired to fight

So my darling, I'll succumb

 

But you'll have to run to me tonight

Tonight I will love you forever

But I'll only ever be a middle distance runner

 

Middle Distance Runner-Sea Wolf

Although, I guess my tastes aren’t all that hard to figure out. I’m kinda predictable actually. Put a cute sweater on a guy, some perfectly fit dark denims, give him some messed up tousled hair, have him strum on his guitar, and sing some lovely li’l lyrics about love and loss and whatnot and somesuch and gosh, I’m all yours. Or at least I’ll pretend I am and then run away. It’s what I do. There’s this really funny idea Mel, Hil and I have for this most awesome engagement/wedding scene that I’m gonna write. It’s so flippin’ hilarious and tragically true. Hehe….

 

Anyway, back to whatever random I was typing. Got distracted by myspace, Pandora, itunes and facebook oh and blogspot. Shit, I have a lot of windows open. So I decided all these baby-blogs I’ve been posting should really be going to my blogspot. I should do more with that. Today at work between the books, and patrons, and computers and cards I found all kinds of adorable fashiony cute gal blogs and totally got lost in that world and it made me wanna update my blogspot.

 

If I do, will you come read it? Yes, you. You right there. Cause I think you’re swell. And maybe you have some time to kill and wanna read whatever crazy crap I have to say. I’d love to read the crazy crap you have to say as well. Afterall, we are friends. And I’m sure I think you’re sexy and that your words are sexy and that your funny is sexy. Yes. Most definitely. I TOTALLY think your funny is sexy. I full heartily agree with every inch of my being that your funny is sexy. I believe funny is the best kinda sexy there is.

 

Okay I’ll stop hitting on you know. Gosh I’m a slut.

 

Actually that’s a lie I’m not a slut. Some might say a prude. But I’m not that either. Others may say a tease. And they might be right. Or maybe not. We’ll never know. Or I’ll blog about that topic tomorrow and then you will. We’ll see. Or not. Or...you know. Okay enough with the ridiculousness.

 

Also, back to original thought that spurred this blog in the first place: Sea Wolf.

 

I am in LOVE with this band. And I don’t use the word “love” willy-nilly . Something about the song “Middle Distance Runner” has captured my heart and it just won’t let it go. I could listen to it for a thousand years on repeat and forever be happy.

 

I love you song.  You are the song for me. I know what you're thinking, I fall in love with songs ever other week, but I think this may be it song. Cause you are pleasant, and fun, and perfect and flawed, and maybe you could love me back? Don’t answer me right now song. Think about it. Marinate on it. And maybe we could have something, you know.

 Okaybye.

~HM~

Honey you are the sea
Upon which I float

And I came here to talk
I think you should know

That green eyes
You’re the one that I wanted to find

And anyone who tried to deny you
Must be out of their mind

Have you ever listened to a band over and over and a song over and over and then all of a sudden you hear a song that you’re sure you’ve heard before but maybe not, and it’s like you just woke up?

That’s what happened this morning at 2am. I was listening to leo ipody and felt in a Coldplay mood and came across the song “Green Eyes” and for some reason always skip this song but today I decided was the day was gonna listen to this song, I’m gonna give it a chance.

It’s so beautiful! Most especially the lines:

And anyone who tried to deny you
Must be out of their mind

Those words just make me incredibly happy because I hope someone one day feels that way about me. They’ll be like, “What do you mean you’ve never dated anyone?! The world must be out of their minds, but really thank goodness, lucky me!”

And in fear of being terribly adorable, I myself have met a green eyed fella’. I actually didn’t know his eyes were green until Tuesday night when I finally asked him what the heck the color of his eyes were. So as we stood there in Hastings in the Young Adult Book Section he took off his glasses, leaned in and said, “Green.” I said, “Oh.”

So…Alex, tag! You’re it!

~HM~

Johnny Flynn- “The Wrote and the Writ”

You wrote me, oh so many letters
And all of them seemed true
Promises look good on paper
Especially from you, from you

The weight of all those willing words
I carried all alone
You wouldn’t put your pen to bed
When we hadn’t found our own, our own

Your sentences rose high at night
And circled round my head
The circle’s since been broken
Like the priest before me is breaking bread

I’m being asked to drink the blood of Christ
And soon I’ll eat his flesh
I’m alone again before the alter
Shedding all my old regrets

The love of my life Jamie B introduced this man to me and the moment I put this CD in my car I fell in love. I seriously haven’t made it past tract 2 because it is AMAZING. And I do mean that with a capital AMAZING.

If I had any tears in me to cry, I would. I’ve had this song on constant repeat and I just get in this mood. I immediately feel a sadness but also something more. I kind of feel a good cry coming on. Which is silly for a girl who doesn’t cry. But I feel that if I watch “Aurora” (by the wonderful Leonard Madrid), listen to this song on repeat and think about the sadness of humanity I could squeeze out a few tears. But probably not.

Especially that whole sadness of humanity part. Cause humanity does make me sad on so many levels when I really think about it. But when I’m sitting at a desk with 5 little toddlers and I’m teaching them how to count and about colors, there is no sadness. There is curiosity, honestly, love. There is the little boy that was putting together a fire truck puzzle and when I asked him what a fire truck does he made a wailing fire engine sound that was quite accurate in its imitation. It made me laugh out loud. There is the adorable precocious girl next to me who loved my boots and ring and hair. There is the lovely little gal with the long golden locks who just couldn’t get enough of story time and kept inching closer and closer ready to jump into the world of the book. There is the quietness of snack time where we shared a cup of apple juice and granola bars. And I told them that apple juice reminds me of childhood. And they all looked at me with an understanding that yes we know what you mean.

When I’m surrounded by moments like these, with friends that are awesome, and with family that is truly one of a kind I can’t feel sadness. And there is a comfort in that. And maybe, just maybe, the world really isn’t all that bad off.

~hm~

This postsecret really made me smile today. I just love the sheer honesty of it. And also the acknowledgement of oh my! Ah shit! Oh fuck! I love you. Haha…it’s like, okay let’s stop denying ourselves and playing the games and just…yeah.

I kind of have the feeling that I’m gonna be like this when I eventually one day far, far into the future maybe possibly one day fall in love. It’ll be a very “Oh fuck. I love you.” It’ll be an epiphany moment. And I’ll have to first admit it to myself and have a good long look in the mirror and be like, “Whelp, Heather, you’re in love. Get over it. Admit it. Go say it.” And then I’ll have to go tell the person. And that’ll be funny.

Heather: Hey uh, so um…Fuck. I love you.
Louie: (laughs) Thank you?
Heather: You’re welcome. Hey lets go watch a movie!
Louie: Oooh! Yeah! You have to pay though. As you’re so obviously in love with me.
Heather: I knew there was a downside.
Louie: I’ll get the popcorn and soda.
Heather: (laughs) Okay then.

So yeah, if you love someone you should definitely tell them when you’re ready. Hopefully that person makes you smile and laugh. Hopefully they take your breath away when you kiss. Not literally of course. That’d be bad. I hope you smile every morning that you get to wake up next to them. And miss them when you are apart. I hope that you still get butterflies and shivers when your other runs their fingers through your hair. I hope that you get to grow old with the love of your life. I hope that you get to sit on your porch underneath the stars and discuss art and life and when you were 28 and first met. I wish you all the best in the world with your love. May you find them and feel so passionate that you just want to say “Oh fuck. I love you.”

~hm~

(Image via postsecret.com)

In case you were curious...

~hm~

(Image via postsecret.com)

Playground Antics

There was once a girl. She was always a bit in love with the idea of love. Being the lovely little awkward thing that she was growing up, she didn't have the opportunity to really cultivate any pre-teen early life romances. She very specifically remembers a time in fourth grade when all the boys decided to chase the girls and smack them on the butt. This apparently sounded fun at the time and so off the girls ran to the side field and off the boys ran chasing after them. She remembers seeing all the boys chase after the popular girl and the second tier popular girls by association. She knew in her mind that even though she hung out with everyone in class and that she was generally liked by all, her glasses, knobby knees and general little girl awkwardness would prevent her from getting lots of smacks on the butt. But then her sorta friend and friend of the popular group, a soccer player and nice guy came up and smacked her on the bottom. She laughed and went screaming off on the sunny playground. Happy to feel included. In her 9 year old mind she knew that it was a pity butt smack but appreciated none the less.

One day the girl grew up. She got braces, contacts and by the middle of her college years at the very fun age of 21 she finally felt like she grew into her features. By the time she turned 24 she felt beautiful. She loved every aspect of her body, she felt very proud of her hips, her lips, her imperfections, her quirks. When she looked in the mirror on a sometimes rare day of extraordinary self awareness she felt alive, connected and gorgeous. She felt like she had a secret waiting to tell the world. Like a laugh was right under the surface waiting to come out. There was a light in her eyes and smile tickling her lips. Today was indeed a glorious and gorgeous day.

Maybe today was the day that a nice young guy would notice her. Notice that want and need to be included. To get a pity smack on the butt cause it was the nice thing to do. Cause it was appreciated, because why the hell not, she does after all have a very nice ass. Maybe today is the day that the guy she likes, that she shyly smiles at will notice her and smile back.

But, if not. That's okay. Its an attention that she doesn't need and if we're being really honest here is kinda scary. She has come this far without the very well placed and intended smack on the butt from the boys on the playground. Shes happy just swinging on the swings with them, discussing her answer for the science question that gave her trouble, holding a door open for them, letting them have an occasion short cut in line to make one feel special. She happy being a friend. Its easy. Its comfortable. Its what she knows.

Maybe one day one of the boys will break away from the pack, from the marauding herds of boys on the playground. He will take a chance and single her out. He will come across the sandy playground, smile at her and she will smile back. And right when she is about to introduce herself he will very deliberately smack her firmly on the ass and run away waiting to be chased by her.

~hm~